Million Dollar Legs

A Paramount Picture (1932) Dir. Edward F. Cline
62 min. / B&W / 1.33:1 / SDH
Universal BD $21.98

Available from our partner Movie Zyng

Welcome to Klopstokia, where the goats get the best of everything and every third person's a spy. All the men are named George and have super powers; all the women are named Angela and are beautiful. Presidential races are decided by arm wrestling (I’ve heard of worse ways) and the cabinet is secretly scheming against President Bill Fields, strongest man in the country, by working out when he's not looking. Migg Tweeny (Jack Oakie) has come to sell brushes door to door, and the first door has lovely Susan "Angela" Fleming behind it; she's the President's daughter, and if he can sing the historical Klopstokian love anthem to her (in the ancient Klopstokian language, before they learned English) he can win her heart. Meanwhile, the country prepares for the Olympics, and notorious foreign temptress Mata Machree (Lyda Roberti) dances the hoochie koochie to lure the team to its unchaste doom.

Absurd, surrealistic, and altogether nutty farce that I've always found hilarious.

Million-dollar Legs Dialog:

Angela, when her boyfriend is taken away for questioning: "Father, they won't hurt him, will they?"

Fields: "Only for about two hours. Then they'll shoot him."

Andy Clyde is the running goat man, Ben Turpin is the head spy, Dickie Moore is Angela's bow & arrow wielding brother, Vernon Dent and Billy Gilbert are cabinet members, and Mata Machree sings a song about how hot she is while she moves her hips in a way that would get any decent woman arrested. I had to pause the new Blu-ray and take a cold shower, more than once.

Eddie Cline directed this absolutely delightful film that’s stocked with old Mack Sennett players in supporting roles (and Fields was making Sennett 2-reelers at about the same time). It was the first of five Fields films directed by Cline; Cline said that Fields liked him because “I was the only man in Hollywood who knew less about making films than he did” but according to some cast members, Fields liked him because his ad-libbing and bits of business often caused Cline to laugh out loud and have to cut a scene early.

Duck Soup is considered the gold standard when it comes to hilarious 1930s political farces, but Million Dollar Legs is very close to it. Note that leading lady Susan Fleming is beautiful and charming and talented, but she’d give up her career in the mid-1930s when she married Harpo Marx, a long and successful marriage indeed.

W.C. Fields deserves the love and attention that Mae West got with a huge Indicator boxed set, but we’re happy to have his films available in new bare-bones Blu-ray editions, even unrestored. They’re not stuffed with bonus material, just laughs. We suspect Fields fans will be satisfied.

The country starving, and YOU with GOLD in your teeth!”

As it turns out – thanks to a plethora of new releases from Universal and MovieZyng – we have the unprecedented opportunity of hosting a W.C. Fields Marathon in the Balcony, with four new reviews! Poke around, you’ll also find reviews of The Big Broadcast of 1938, Mississippi, and International House.